With a comedic career spanning decades, Adam Sandler has made a name for himself. The new Sammi Cohen directorial shines light on his daughter – Sunny, who plays the lead role of Stacy Friedman. ‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ is a coming-of-age dramedy that follows Stacy’s awkward adolescence as she prepares for her bat mitzvah. Her plans for this ‘most important day of her life’ get ruined by a set of inevitable situations.
Alison Peck wrote the film’s screenplay based on a novel of the same name by Fiona Rosenbloom. Besides Sunny and Adam, the film stars Idina Menzel, Samantha Lorraine, Jackie Sandler, Sadie Sandler, Dylan Hoffman, and Sarah Sherman in the central roles. Spoilers ahead.
You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah (2023) Plot Summary & Movie Synopsis
What is ‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ about?
‘You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah’ follows Stacy Friedman (Sunny Sandler) preparing for her bat mitzvah. Since it is the most important day of her life, she wants everything to be picture-perfect about the celebration. She also wishes her crush – Andy Goldfarb (Dylan Hoffman), to sweep her off her feet after she dances her heart out with her best friend – Lydia Rodriguez Katz (Samantha Lorraine). But all of those are just her dreams. While she imagines all of it in her bedroom, her mother, Bree (Idina Menzel) interrupts her daydreaming. Stacy reluctantly walks out to go for wearing heels that she loves. But Bree tells her to go wear another pair. Even if Danny (Adam Sandler) sways her mind, Stacy breaks them and ends up going out in a pair of Converse.
Stacy and Lydia
On their way, the Friedman family picks up Lydia for a ride to the party. Ronnie (Sadie Sandler) and her friend Zaara (Zaara Kuttemperoor) watch a film on their phone, drink booze, and tease their classmates. Meanwhile, Stacy and Lydia meet Nikki (Millie Thorpe) and Tara (Dylan Chloe Dash) and plan their bat mitzvahs. Stacy notices Dylan and gets instantly mesmerized by him. The next day, she shows her parents the dream plan for her bat mitzvah celebration. But her dreams are too expensive, which neither Danny nor Bree could completely agree with.
So suddenly, Stacy feels as if her life is falling apart. She feels a perfect bat mitzvah would make Andy see her in a different light and bring them together. Kym Chang Cohen (Miya Cech), Megan Levy (Ivory Baker), and their friends look cool, but she doesn’t. So, she feels she must have everything designed to make her not look like a loser in their eyes.
The First Argument
Later, Kym invites Lydia to come meet her friends at her house. She and Stacy get pumped up to hang out with these cool kids. Ronnie gives her some advice on how to behave and not mess up this chance to level up in their social circle. It includes not disagreeing with anything they ask. So, Stacy plans to go when they ask them to join them at the ledge. Lydia hesitates, considering how scary it would be. But Stacy manages to convince her to go on this adventure.
Eventually, at the ledge, Megan dares Stacy to jump in the water from a considerable height. Lydia tries to stop her, but Stacy does it anyway. Once she jumps, everyone starts cheering for her. But within moments, her pad starts flowing over the water, and they all start laughing at her. Lydia also joins them, which hurts Stacy more than any other embarrassment. She gets mad that her best friend does not have her back. So, she stops responding to any of Lydia’s messages.
After ghosting Lydia for a bit, Stacy decides to meet her to patch things up. She asks her father to drop her off at Lydia’s place. Stacy walks in to find many kids partying, which surprises her. She walks awkwardly through a crowd of kids to find a girl kissing Andy. Moments later, she realizes that the girl is none other than Lydia. She feels betrayed and hurt, considering how she always gushed over Andy with Lydia. To get back at her, Stacy plans to disclose a secret on an anonymous account. Rabbit Rebecca (Sarah Sherman) catches her using the phone during the class. So, after the class, she talks to her about her responsibilities as an adult.
On the other hand, Lydia gets mad at Stacy for sharing her embarrassing secret. Stacy cannot control her anger anymore. So, she decides to ruin Lydia’s bat mitzvah entrance video. Later, she learns that Andy’s grandma is in a retirement home. So, she goes there to impress him. But Lydia keeps getting closer to him and the cool kids, which makes Stacy more and more jealous. That’s why she thinks of other ways to break up his and Lydia’s relationship and swoop in herself. She sneaks some photos into Andy’s phone to make him interested in her. Besides she also tells him that Lydia lied about kissing other boys in the camp. Through that, she tries to make Lydia look bad in his eyes.
Meanwhile, the bat mitzvah anxieties persist. Bree does not let Stacy purchase an over-expensive dress. She expects Stacy to make a reasonable choice instead. In the store, they bump into Lydia and her parents – Gabi (Jackie Sandler) and Eli (Luis Guzman), who are about to get divorced. Eli is already on a few dating apps. Meanwhile, Gabi thinks Danny is a better husband to Bree than he was to her. But Lydia and Stacy stay mad at each other. Later in school, Stacy sees Mateo helping out young Jewish kids with their prayers, even though he isn’t Jewish. These young kids also speak about their problems, like life-and-death situations!
Andy meets Stacy and says that he wants to kiss her. But they cannot find a spot to sneak in. Finally, they enter the prayer room and hide behind the curtains. She hesitates to kiss them, thinking God would be mad at them. But Andy sways her mind, and they share a kiss. But within moments, the Rabbi finds them kissing before the Torah. Rebecca advises her to act more responsibly since she is soon going to have her bat mitzvah. She also informs Friedmans about it. Back home, Danny gets mad at her for disrespecting the God. Meanwhile, Bree sends Lydia’s bat mitzvah entrance video from Stacy’s laptop.
You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah (2023) Movie Ending Explained:
Do Stacy and Lydia become friends again?
Lydia’s Bat Mitzvah
Despite their weeks of fighting, Bree convinces Stacy to come join Lydia for her bat mitzvah celebration. As an introduction, DJ Shmuley puts on the video Stacy made. It begins with some cute photos from Lydia’s childhood. But Stacy realizes that she edited this video when she was mad at Lydia. That’s when she added many bits to embarrass her friend. She urges the DJ to stop the video from playing. But he refuses to do so. Unfortunately, that’s how Stacy ends up embarrassing her best friend. They both start crying out of embarrassment. Stacy tries to make up for her mistakes, but Lydia thinks it’s too late for it.
Stacy’s Bat Mitzvah
After her fallout with Lydia, Stacy still had to go through her own bat mitzvah. Because of all that happened, she refuses to attend it herself. Bree and Danny somehow bring her to the temple. Stacy takes the stage to read out her prayers. Midway, she stops to apologize for her mistakes to the crowd. She addresses her friends, the cool kids, and Andy and conveys how clearly she sees who they are now. Stacy regrets ruining her friendship with her best friend just for a guy who is not even that great at basketball. Finally, she acknowledges what adulthood is when she steps into it through this ceremony.
After reading out her prayers, Stacy runs out of the temple directly to Lydia’s house. She apologizes to her for ruining her bat mitzvah and asks for forgiveness. But Lydia cannot let go of her anger that quickly. So, Stacy cannot find a closure. Back home, Bree surprises Stacy by gifting her a super-expensive dream dress. Stacy wears it to her party, where Lydia is also invited. Ultimately, we see Stacy sacrifice her ideas about her dream bat mitzvah to celebrate how Lydia wanted it. So, ultimately, Stacy and Lydia reconcile and get back together as friends.